Generated by All in One SEO v4.9.0, this is an llms.txt file, used by LLMs to index the site. # Attachment Theory ## Sitemaps - [XML Sitemap](http://attachmenttheory.net/sitemap.xml): Contains all public & indexable URLs for this website. ## Posts - [Alcohol - The effects on Attachment, Families and Love](http://attachmenttheory.net/alcohol/) - Alcohol is classified as a Group 1 carcinogen, meaning there is strong evidence that it causes cancer. It is the most widely used psychoactive substance and by definition it is poisonous. Abusing alcohol or alcohol addiction is pathological, compulsive, incredibly destructive to relationships and both psychologically and physiologically habit-forming. It destroys families, careers, workplaces and - [Musings on Love and Loss](http://attachmenttheory.net/musings/) - There have been some ongoing few visits to this website - a most curious occurrence as I started this project as a place to notate my own personal collections and research findings on Attachment Theory. There is no doubt some bias and leaning on the article selections and headings. They are directed towards affirming my - [Researchers of Love and Attachment Theory](http://attachmenttheory.net/researchers-of-love-and-attachment-theory/) - Attachment Theory Researchers Love Researchers - [Co-Dependency - an abused term](http://attachmenttheory.net/co-dependency/) - Melody Beattie (published 'Co-dependent no more', 1986) and Robin Norwood (published 'Women Who Love Too Much', 1985) popularized the term co-dependency in their self-help books, borrowing a concept from Alcohol and addiction research and applying it to romantic relationships. This popularization led to an influx of publications, almost obscuring the original meaning of the term - [Infidelity and it's consequences](http://attachmenttheory.net/infidelity-and-its-consequences/) - While some transgressions in relationships may be trivial, those involving betrayal have significant impacts on relationships and can be significant contributors to it's demise. When someone in a relationship is unfaithful, it typically leaves their spouse to believe they are no longer trustworthy. Difficult to forgive, and perhaps impossible to be forgotten, infidelity cuts at - [Overcoming Heartbreak - Letters from the Other Side of Loss](http://attachmenttheory.net/overcoming-heartbreak-letters-from-the-other-side-of-loss/) - A growing collection of stories of overcoming grief to find a truly meaningful life in spite of loss and hardship - [Sexuality and Attachment](http://attachmenttheory.net/sexuality-and-attachment/) - Themes the subordination of the sexual system to attachment processes under relationship-threatening circumstances. the role of sex as a promoter of emotional bonds. attachment orientations help explain variations in the way in people construe their sexual interactions Ideas Research has generally indicated that smooth functioning of the attachment system facilitates relaxed engagement in sexual activities - [Polyamory](http://attachmenttheory.net/polyamory/) - Polyamory refers to multiple, committed, love-based relationships with the consent of all the partners. Modern History of Polyamory in Western Culture It is worth exploring the history of Polyamory and popularization of polyamory. In this it's possible to see that the recent growth and popularity of non-monogamy is a reflection of late capitalist values, marking - [Glossary of terms and definitions](http://attachmenttheory.net/glossary-of-terms-and-definitions/) - There is a way in which communication between research groups, and communication with the wider public, has been hindered by confusion about the meaning of concepts.... Part of the appeal of attachment research lies in its central reference to experience-near metaphors and terms such as ‘attachment’, ‘mother’, ‘security’, ‘sensitivity’, ‘disorganization’, ‘coherence’, ‘anxiety’, ‘dissociation’, and ‘trauma’". - [Narcissism and Narcissistic Personality Disorder](http://attachmenttheory.net/narcissism-and-narcissisticpersonality-disorder/) - When healthy attachment is missing, the development of empathy and reflectivity is inhibited. This leads to developmental failures that promote dissociation and internationalization of an unavailable and punitive object where the defense can become aggression and violence. Negative experiences may then become the only way of relating to others. Allcorn, Seth; Duncan, Carrie M. A - [Trust and Jealousy](http://attachmenttheory.net/trust-and-jealousy/) - Trust that one’s partner has their best interests at heart is one of the most important and highly valued qualities in romantic relationships, predicting many positive individual and relational outcomes. The Price of Distrust: Trust, Anxious Attachment, Jealousy, and Partner Abuse This page is still under construction Trust difficulty is often a result of past - [Directory](http://attachmenttheory.net/directory/) - Glossary of terms and definitions Quotes and Passages - 08.01.2024 updated History of Attachment Theory Internal Working Models Narcissism and Narcissistic Personality Disorder Changing our patterns Documentaries Avoidant Anxious Excessive Reassurance Seeking Trust and Jealousy Attachment Compatibility Sexual Desire Discrepancy Criticism of Attachment Theory Feminism and Attachment Theory - [Quotes and passages](http://attachmenttheory.net/quotes-and-passages/) - The awareness of human separation, without reunion by love--is the source of shame. It is a at the same time the source of guilt and anxiety. The deepest need of humans, then, is the need to overcome their separateness, to leave the prison of aloneness. The absolute failure to achieve this aim means insanity, because - [Avoidant](http://attachmenttheory.net/avoidant/) - Infants can turn away and move away in a cold manner, but their hearts are pumping hot: Avoidant infants who turn or move away from their parents on reunion in the Strange Situation, exhibit physiological arousal (elevated heart rate) rather than inhibition (Biobehavioral organization in securely and insecurely attached infants). Avoidants idealize parents, but can't - [Feminism and Attachment Theory](http://attachmenttheory.net/feminism-and-attachment-theory/) - [In the 1950s], Bowlby argued that a young child needs their mother ‘as an ever-present companion’, providing ‘the provision of constant attention night and day, seven days a week, and 365 days in the year’. What he hoped to get across, above all, was that young children should have someone they feel confident turning to - [Caring for our children](http://attachmenttheory.net/caring-for-our-children/) - If you look at the ethnographic accounts of band-level hunter-gatherer in Africa or Melanesia—though I’m not sure I can say this for South America—what jumps out at you is the indulgence towards children. Child abuse would not have been tolerated. Other group members would have intervened, the perpetrators socially ostracized, possibly even expelled from the - [Secure](http://attachmenttheory.net/secure/) - The secure pattern characterizes the infant who seeks and receives protection, reassurance, and comfort when stressed. Confident exploration is optimized because of the support and availability of the caregiver." Handbook of Attachment. Second Edition. p. 601 - [Couples Therapy](http://attachmenttheory.net/couples-therapy/) - We need to take couples therapy more seriously at a governmental level in terms of funding: "The treatment of couple distress simply has not been a priority of government funding over the last decade. It is perhaps the most important conclusion of this review that, given all we have come to know about the toxicity - [Anxious](http://attachmenttheory.net/anxious/) - Individuals scoring high in anxiety attachment would be characterized by an excessive preoccupation and fear of being abandoned by their partner. Frontiers | Avoidant Attachment, Withdrawal-Aggression Conflict Pattern, and Relationship Satisfaction: A Mediational Dyadic Model (frontiersin.org) The anxiety dimension concerns the extent to which the attachment system is activated by environmental and interpersonal stressors. Anxious - [Internal Working Models](http://attachmenttheory.net/internal-working-models/) - Internal Working Models change based on new relational experience: "most also agree that IWMs change developmentally based on new relational experiences, a view nicely expressed by Theodore Waters, who stated that IWMs “contain multiple constructs that unfold in a particular developmental sequence, change in latent structure, and undergo extensive generalization and elaboration across development” (Waters, 2021, - [Changing our patterns](http://attachmenttheory.net/changing-our-patterns/) - The neurotic who is cured has really become another man, though at bottom, of course, he has remained the same; that is to say, he has become what he might have become at best under the most favorable conditions. But that is a very great deal. Freud, S. (1916–1917) Introductory Lectures on Psycho-Analysis. The above - [Criticism of Attachment Theory](http://attachmenttheory.net/criticism-of-attachment-theory/) - Which flaws in Bowlby’s and Ainsworth’s empirical,conceptual, and theoretical work have attachment scholars acknowledged and decided to reject or to modify? And, what is attachment theory today? Vicedo, Marga. (2018). On the history, present, and future of attachment theory. Reply to Robbie Duschinsky, Marinus van IJzendoorn, Sarah Foster, Sophie Reijman & Francesca Lionetti ‘attachment histories - [Documentaries](http://attachmenttheory.net/documentaries/) - [History of Attachment Theory](http://attachmenttheory.net/timeline-of-attachment-theory/) - so long as our history is hidden from us, so long as we hide our history from ourselves, we are very likely to see the present and future in the terms of the past John Bowlby (1989) Attachment and Loss: Continuing Education Seminars. - [Excessive Reassurance Seeking](http://attachmenttheory.net/excessive-reassurance-seeking/) - Definitions Excessive reassurance seeking (ERS) behavior is defined as “the relatively stable tendency to excessively and persistently seek assurances from others that one is lovable and worthy, regardless of whether such assurance has already been provided” (Joiner, Metalsky, Katz, & Beach, 1999, p. 270). Ideas DEPRESSED SEEK REASSURANCE BUT DOUBT WHAT THEY RECEIVE: Coyne (1976) - [Sexual Desire Discrepancy](http://attachmenttheory.net/sexual-desire-discrepancy/) - Issues regarding sexual desire are among the most commonlyreported complaints among couples." Sexual Desire Discrepancy: A Position Statement of the EuropeanSociety for Sexual Medicine This page is still under construction Definitions Sexual desire is the (subjective) experience of being attracted to or pushed towards objects or behaviors with potential rewarding effects. 9 Sexual desire discrepancy - [Attachment Compatibility](http://attachmenttheory.net/attachment-compatibility/) - Previous research in relationship satisfactionhas indicated that when one member of the couple hashigh avoidant attachment and another has high anxiousattachment, the relationship may be difficult to maintain Bibliography Dimensions of Adult Attachment, Affect Regulation, and Romantic Relationship Functioning. Brennan, K. A., Shaver, P. R. (study examines avoidant and anxious attachment somewhere) ## Pages - [Attachment Theory - Science of Love](http://attachmenttheory.net/) - Welcome. Here you will find a valuable resource on Attachment Theory, Relationship research and insightful advice from Psychologists and Teachers on the science and wisdom of love. The website is designed and supplemented with the intention of providing information for creating more fulfilling, meaningful and deeper connections and healthy, loving relationships. LATEST WRITINGS Alcohol – - [test](http://attachmenttheory.net/test/) - Satisfying relationships are a source of psychological and somatic well-being and can serve as a buffer against life's stresses. - [Journals](http://attachmenttheory.net/journals/) - Attachment: New Directions in Psychotherapy and Relational Psychoanalysis ## Categories - [Uncategorized](http://attachmenttheory.net/category/uncategorized/)